Of Course I Prayed for Kamala

And of course I know that God does not 
Keep a tally of the prayer-votes
Like an old man scratching lines on the edge of a desk
With a pen knife

Well, if only Susan had remembered to say her prayers
Kamala would have won Wisconsin.
But the bros in Pennsylvania just had more scratch marks, so

Please.

My god is bigger than that, 
And so is theirs.

And of course I tried to visualize victory
Like a good little manifester,
I made a vision board
Saw the gorgeous smile
The brown hand of the woman in the tailored pantsuit
Clasping the white one of the old governor
Arms lifted like prizefighters

A sea of blue hopscotching America
The glass ceiling finally smashed

And did the universe shrug?
Say (or think, or whatever the universe “does”)
Not enough people could see it, so

No.

What do I know? 
Sarasponda. 
Inhale, exhale.
The creek rises and falls

And God is on the side of 
The man dying on the cross
Los pobres de la tierra
The sex worker in the center of the circle
Saved when Jesus asks,
Who among you can cast the first stone?

Last night I went to bed oblivious
Too scared to know anything, 
But my dreams told me what I didn’t want to know:
The news on TV declaring victory
The camera showing the candidate on crutches hobbling 
Back to the White House in the dark.

Of course I prayed for Kamala
I wasn’t alone. 
Women around the world were holding vigil
Praying that justice could be served
Praying for the safety of American women.

But what does it mean when people say, 
I’m praying for you? 

Did I pray for her to win? 
Only in my most terrified, selfish moments.

No. I prayed for her.

Maybe God listened, spared her, cared for her.
Perhaps, after all, our prayers were answered.

I wrote this poem on November 6, 2024 as part of the 30 Poems in November fundraiser for Center for New Americans. To donate to this cause, please visit this page.